Publix, where shopping is a pleasure.

I used to roll my eyes at the slogan for the grocery store, Publix, because it says, "Publix, where shopping is a pleasure." Shopping? A pleasure? Impossible, to be sure.

That is, until Saturday, when I was drawn to Publix by some ama(aaa)zing advertised sales. Let me tell you, this was the best grocery shopping experience of my life.

First of all, I got a third-from-the-front parking space. And no one tried to zip into the space in front of me. And there were no stray shopping carts in sight poised to crash into my car.

Then I entered the cleanest - CLEANEST I tell you - grocery store ever. Wide aisles, too.

I wandered into the produce section and found every single vegetable and fruit I wanted, plus some I'd never heard of. Every item was perfectly fresh... You know how usually you pick up a carton of strawberries and see a few inside that are already mushy or fuzzy? Not at Publix, my friend. I got perfect squash, zucchini, tomatoes, carrots, cucumbers... I got fresh whole green beans, for crying out loud.

They had the cuts of meat I needed. The cheeses I needed were on sale. And most importantly, the Dove ice cream bars I wanted were on sale.

I was kindly greeted throughout the store by no fewer than eight employees. The cashier was fast, older than seventeen, and carried on a friendly conversation with me. And when a few items didn't ring up correctly, I got them for FREE. Apparently, it's the Publix Promise.

They take out your groceries for you and insist on zero tipping.

And for the singular item I needed that Publix does not carry, I stopped at Wal-Mart. I was nearly hit twice in the parking lot and ended up parking in the absolute last spot in the row, the store was crowded, people were hollering.

I've been converted.